Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Oscar Aftermath

ACTOR--LEADING:
I SAID:RYAN GOSLING, Half Nelson
Wrong! Forrest Whitaker took it, and I'm not surprised--he was really good in Last King of Scotland. Betting on The Gos was sort of a gamble, anyway.

ACTOR--SUPPORTING:
I SAID:MARK WAHLBERG, The Departed
Wrong! It went to Alan Arkin for his brilliant performance in Little Miss Sunshine. I'm happy to be wrong about this one--this was a fantastic movie and he was great in it. Way to go, Alan! Your long life of character acting has yielded Hollywood's highest honor at last.

ACTRESS--LEADING:
I SAID:HELEN MIRREN, The Queen
Booyah! She looked gorgeous, too. A sexy dame, that Helen.

ACTRESS--SUPPORTING:
I SAID:JENNIFER HUDSON, Dreamgirls
Booyah!

ANIMATED FEATURE:
I SAID:CARS
Wrong! But who really cared about any of these movies winning? Someone needs to step up and give this catagory a shot in the arm, stat!

DIRECTING:
I SAID:UNITED 93
Wrong! Nice one, Marty.

DOCUMENTARY FEATURE:
I SAID:AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH
Booyah! This was a no-brainer.

FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM:
I SAID:PAN’S LABYRINTH
Wrong! It went to that movie about Berlin...no, no, not the one with Clooney, the OTHER one about Berlin.

ORIGINAL SONG:
I SAID:“LISTEN” - Dreamgirls
Wrong! The most unmemorable, uninteresting song won instead. I enjoyed this mediocre performance about as much as I enjoy wheatgrass and sorgum health shakes. If I had been sitting in the audience, mine would have been the confused, too loud, "What the fuck?!?!" after they announced the winner.

SCREENPLAY--ADAPTED:
I SAID:THE DEPARTED
Booyah!

SCREENPLAY--ORIGINAL:
I SAID:LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE
Booyah! I was wrong, this movie was thrown two bones. That's not bad; with two bones, baby you got a stew going.

BEST PICTURE:
I SAID:THE DEPARTED
Booyah!


I know everyone is complaining about how long the awards were this year, but I really enjoyed them. There's just something about this big, self-indulgent party Hollywood throws for itself that's utterly charming to me. When you get right down to it, these are people who work really hard, even if they're seen as some of the most privaleged in the country. They're good at what they do, and seeing people who are good at their work, and who love their work so much, is always pleasing no matter the profession. (Barring of course people who have dumb jobs, like televised dog show commentators.) I'm glad the awards have gone back to doing what they do best--celebrating movies and the people who make them, not providing a soapbox for quasipolitical oration. Thanks for being awesome, Hollywood, I'll see you next year.

1 comment:

T said...

I was completely stoked for Departed and Forest Whittaker- those were the two best movies of the year in my book. Hudson was a gimme, as was Scorcese, but I was surpised that Melissa Etheridge won- then again, everyone in Hollywood is
a. gay and
b. green.
So I guess it makes sense. Also, Ellen's clothes were hidous. Is it that hard to find a well tailored suit for the freaking host of the Oscars?